Dude.

Seriously. Geez.

I've written three full entries- two today, one yesterday- that my computer has just erased. DUDE. Oh well. At least today I have enough time to write again. Tobin AND Aiden are napping at the same time- something that hasn't happened in days. All three times I wrote, I've written about different things I'd done lately and all that usual stuff, but something struck when I was making toast (yay, Julie cooking!) that I'm going to write about instead.

The thought was this: I know that I am special. Not like "special bus" special, thankyou and certainly not holier-than-thou, either. But set apart. Lucky. Blessed. I think even having that knowledge makes me a little bit different than some, or sadly, most people. I might go as fas as to say I think most of what goes wrong in people starts after they forget that. Some people think I'm great at singing, or writing or mothering or whatever, and that's why I'm so nifty. I love all those things, despite my abilities in them. It has nothing to do with something that I can do, not do, have or not have.

I realized that I know I'm (insert appropriate adjective here) because I see the variety of people in my life I can feel real connection to. There are SO many people who I just love and think are great people that I have such an honor and treasure in knowing. I have such a wealth of talent around me, as well as of wisdom  and friendship and love. The fact that these people choose to share themselves with me- that is what tells me I'm okay- doing something right, blessed, and I try and be grateful for it every day I am alive.

One of the pictures (if/when they let me load them!) is of the 5 generations I have just here in Santa Rosa, taken Sunday at Me-Ma's 100th birthday party. (go, Me-Ma!) The Generations are (from the bottom up) 1) Tobin & Aiden, 2)Myself, 3)My mother, Jan Johnson 4) her mother, Bobbe Kruger and her mother, Viola Madsen. (there's that Danish side) THAT is awesome. I don't know of anyone else who has a working relationship and constant access to their great grandmother. I feel bad for not having visited her more in recent days, but she's fragile and Tobin's a wrecking ball. He's very sweet, but he's a wrecking ball.